This week I heard one of my cats seems to have tumor at his side. Well, again.

I could not think of anything and it was terrible to hear that during critique week. I decided not to be agitated by things and constently do what I have to do, however, I, again, could not defeat grief and fear that I will farewell my beloved one soon. Spending most of time lying on the bed during critique week, I wished what is happening now is all dream and I am one of characters in novels or cartoons. I thought I’m fed up enough and I don’t have time to mourn even my pet’s leaving. Ten years. It is time we spent together– he is as good as my sibling. I do not understand why things happen at once. There is nothing I can do for him now. How impotent. And I have to explain how this personal tragedy relates to my final project. All I feel is death. Death again, and I realize I am never able to overcome the fear of death itself, being left behind, and sepearation by death.

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